Beautiful Invisibles

Just Wait

2010-02-12T20:58:00.000+08:00

Just Wait

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried.
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child, you must wait!"

"'Wait?', you say, wait!" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and am claiming your Word.

"My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to WAIT?
I'm needing a 'yes,' a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign.

"And Lord, you promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply!"

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait."
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting. . . for what?"

He seemed then to kneel and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want -- but, you wouldn't know ME.

"You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint;
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there;
You'd not know the joy of resting in me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.

"You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of my Spirit descends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save. . .(for a start),
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of my heart.

"The glow of my comfort late into the night.
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have last.

"You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for thee.'
Yes, your dreams for your loved ones overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss! If I lost what I'm doing in you!

"So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know ME.
And though oft may my answers seem terribly late,
My wisest of answers is still but to WAIT."

Be cunning as serpents and innocent as doves

2010-02-10T23:39:00.003+08:00

Matthew 10:16
Luke 16:1-5

The phrase "Be Cunning as Serpents and innocent as doves" makes me think hard to really understand and comprehends completely. Honestly, I always suspect that I never fully understand it.

These few words are somehow always related together with the parable of Shrewd Manager. Found in different book of the NT, seemingly unrelated, yet when placed to each other together. They are aligned and behind both stories tells a story about a higher principle at play.

Innocent as dove is easy to understand, innocent means faultless, not the villain nor the victim, a person who is not at blame when judgement is met out. However, when it is paired with "cunning as a serpent", the sentences morph into something complicated. Two contrasting position, with opposite connotation. They opposes each other and makes the whole sentence hard to grasp immediately. How do I be cunning as a snake while innocent as a dove at the same time?

Cunningness is the ability to profit from a situation. The situation could be ad-hoc or manufactured by the person. He understands and is able to read human nature. The greedy, the frighten, the weak, the proud, the ambitious and use that these human desires to his advantage.

If someone is able to do that and yet not turn the situation to his personal advantage but changes it so that all parties emerges a better people. People who learnt something more about himself and from it, grows. Will that be as innocent as dove?

And in that light, the Shrewd Manager is able to understand human nature to reciprocate. He discounted the debtor payments, triggering the human nature to repay him even if the person may not like him.

Higher Ground / Idde Schultz

2009-12-29T00:51:00.005+08:00

This song is very rare, hard to find. Google offers no direct matches. Torrent and emule did not offer any hits. Yet, its melody and lyrics are simple and beautiful, deserving to be found.

Luckily, there is blog entry that offer a clue, to search into Google groups. And that finally leads to the english version. The song is originally in Swedish (You can find the original song in Youtube). A smash hit in 1995 (in Sweden). The original title is Högre mark (Higher Ground.)

And finding the lyrics online is a unsolvable challenge. I have to get the lyrics in the old fashion way, by listening to it.

Do let me know if there correction required (especially in the 4th stanza)

higher ground by idde schultz

hey you
it is not that i looking for good news
not expecting any changes in you
no no that not why i am back

hey you
i did not came back to your house again
to find out if you have a brand new friend
it was long ago that i was sick with desire

[Chorus]
I just wanna know a secret
And find out if there is
A blue blue heaven for the bitter
Where we could fly and then land again
On higher ground

hey you,
do u remember when the nights awake
look picture at ice cold space
on a arise as such
when nothing can happens.

[Chorus]

hey you
it is not that i looking for good news
not expecting any changes in you
no no that not why i am back

hey you
i should ask myself the reason why
I think i see the answer in yr eyes
it is a color that, and is not the one I remember

GrandMa

2009-12-15T13:36:00.002+08:00

You lie on in the bed, feeling memories flooding over you, wondering why memories of her cames to you, remembering her pampering of you when you are young, remembering how she bought a schoolbag for you when she overheard you asking one from your parent. You remember how disappointed you are that it was not the type you wanted but you still keep till you were in your adult years.

You remember the nurse fondly smiling when they relate the story of how she ask them if she is pretty still after they bathed her. You always remember her cheerful self.

Thou it been years since she went to a better place. You wishes you had make grandma's last days happier.

StanChart 2009 Marathon Bib 20892 (4hrs 37min)

2009-12-06T20:18:00.003+08:00

My one and only marathon, it was an experience and finished in 4hrs37min. The training helped. I was able to keep a constant pace for 27km, exhaustion take over after 32 km mark.

Maybe a longer training running distance would had helped me be conditioned to the exhaustion effects. That said, not again, it is too bad for my knees.

Princess on a jet plane

2009-12-03T23:31:00.002+08:00

Tonight, dearest Princess is leaving on a jet plane with her husband-to-be. She is so happy and joyful, chirping and smiling, as we walked to the custom gate. And Des matches her character well, a serious, mature and stable person, to her playful, free-spirit and caring nature.

With a mixture of sadness and happiness in my heart, I waved goodbye to her as she crossed past the custom on her way to a new life phase. I wished I said a more proper goodbye to her.

Dear Princess, I will pray for your future happiness and asked God to gave you strength and hope in this new phase of your life.

Church of St Terea

2009-11-16T23:59:00.002+08:00

Church of St Terea is a gazetted monument now. Meaning it stand forever as it is as the building represent a heritage of history and contributions of/to the community around it.

Standing on a hill, away from the buzzy roads, its gentle domes reach up to the skies, a single cross against the open sky, a beautiful white structure along Kampong Bahru road. Many times I glanced at it on my way to SGH and it always bring peace to my eyes as I see it standing tall against the blue sky.

Never did I knew that it will bring me back to God so many years in the future later. It was here that I promised God to be faithful and have my faith restored in Him. It was here that I felt belonged in the solemn, traditional and formal celebration.

Maybe it is the beautiful interior, maybe it is the good acoustics, maybe it is the formality of the celebration, maybe it is all of these. Ultimately they were what I needed then. A place to be comforted in, a place to gave thanks for His blessings, a place to root myself in that turbulent period. A rock for me to stand tall again.

I am so happy that it is gazetted now and in my opinion is all churches should be inspiring beautiful structure that cries out to be seen, to draw people to visit it and to learn about God.

Maturity

2009-11-04T22:44:00.002+08:00

You wonder why, why some people never realized that you are giving way to them, to keep the peace. You realized that is not the best approach to take. Keeping peace is not as good as making peace. You realized that you have to be sharp and to the point, for those who are arrogant, proud, foolish and immature. Sharp with love and a spirit to teach and let them learn their actions are incorrect and immature.

These are for acquaintance and friends. Never to the animals in the corporate world. Some are intentional and are very good actors in hiding their immaturity and inexperience. You need to find another way to deals with these animals.

Forgiveness

2009-10-29T23:18:00.000+08:00

Forgiving does not mean forgetting that you have been wronged or pretending you have not been hurt. It does not mean that you must like a person who has caused you pain. Forgiving does mean releasing the pain to God.

Getting the other person to change their actions, behavior or words isn't the point of forgiveness. In fact, the other person may never change or apologize for the offense. Think of forgiveness more about how it can change your life by bringing you more peace, happiness, and emotional and spiritual healing.

Forgiveness takes away the power the other person continues to wield in your life. Through forgiveness, you choose to no longer define yourself as a victim. Forgiveness is done primarily for yourself, and less so for the person who wronged you.

It does not mean reconciliation as it may not be appropriate where trust is lost and difficult to be rebuilt in the current present situation.

Forgiving isn't the same as forgetting what happened to you. The act that hurt or offended you may always remain a part of your life. But forgiveness can lessen its grip on you and help you focus on other, positive parts of your life. Forgiveness also doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act.

- Extracted from various websites with my own commentaries.

Be Bold each day

2009-10-29T23:15:00.002+08:00

Be bold each day means bringing yourself to do an action outside yr comfort zone, that take you to the edge of fear, where crossing it brings the potential of a good outcome. Meaning giving you a chance where not taking action means no chance at all.

Happy Brithday!

2009-10-19T22:22:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday, Beautiful Invisibles!

Singapore Highway Code

2009-06-25T20:54:00.002+08:00

It will be very normal if the highway code for Singapore is found online. Googling only shows up 2 requests on forums to the relevant government agency to place it online. The highway code consist of 2 books and costs at most < $10 together.

Well, I dun have one and I borrowed both of them the last time I needed them for passing my basic and advanced theory tests. And I as suspected, most of my friends borrowed theirs too.

Beyonc - Halo

Melaka 20 June to 21 June

2009-06-21T22:54:00.014+08:00

I wanted a break from work the month before and planned an excursion out of Singapore. I was really looking forward to it and somehow the wait eroded the excitement for it.

Days before the trip, there was multiple signs that I should not go. Events that I am interested in were happening on those 2 days. Even work beboking me to stay back. I still went ahead. And amid in it all, I encountered the Singaporean family I met in turkey, which is a good sign.

Overall, the trip will be more enjoyable if I had planned more and chosen the correct people to go with.

Jonker Street Chendol (Jonker Desert 88)
Really love this chendol, and a must visit place whenever I go to Meleka.

The laksa is deliciously sourish and it does not use coconut milk in the soup base.

Finally we tried the Chicken rice ball. Personally, I prefer the singapore chicken rice with its loose and non-compacted rice. The rice was too squashed to tastes good.

Ole Sayan (average)
Aunty Lee was fully booked, so we tried this alternative Nyonya Restaurant. The gang agreed that it does not worth a second visit.

2 Cor 6:1-10

2009-06-16T00:18:00.002+08:00

I realized there are many translation of the same verse and chapter. Some in more modern English using more direct, simpler expression. The reading I read today morning used more complicated words, e.g. affectation, salvation, which I personally find makes it harder to grasp the intentions and meaning behind God words.

The search for better understanding of how to express and read out loud the passage leads me to find the simpler and more direct translation first. So to gain a better understanding of the passage's purpose before attempting to practice on the RC version which tends to use more older sentence structure and words.

=======================

Brothers and sisters:
As your fellow workers, we appeal to you
not to receive the grace of God in vain.
For he says:

In an acceptable time I heard you,
and on the day of salvation I helped you.

Behold, now is a very acceptable time;
behold, now is the day of salvation.
We cause no one to stumble in anything,
in order that no fault may be found with our ministry;
on the contrary, in everything we commend ourselves
as ministers of God, through much endurance,
in afflictions, hardships, constraints,
beatings, imprisonments, riots,
labors, vigils, fasts;
by purity, knowledge, patience, kindness,
in the Holy Spirit, in unfeigned love, in truthful speech,
in the power of God;
with weapons of righteousness at the right and at the left;
through glory and dishonor, insult and praise.
We are treated as deceivers and yet are truthful;
as unrecognized and yet acknowledged;
as dying and behold we live;
as chastised and yet not put to death;
as sorrowful yet always rejoicing;
as poor yet enriching many;
as having nothing and yet possessing all things.

Quote II

2009-06-14T21:09:00.000+08:00

"The future is not a result of choices among alternative paths offered by the present, but a place that is created--created first in the mind and will, created next in activity. The future is not some place we are going to, but one we are creating. The paths are not to be found, but made, and the activity of making them, changes both the maker and the destination." - John Schaar

Birthday Song - Corrinne May

2009-06-10T23:58:00.003+08:00

This song really express it well if dedicated to a old, familiar friend. It is a refreshing change from the traditional Happy Birthday tune. A excellent choice to gift away, expressing how only time can bless the person with maturity, wisdom and health.

Here the lyrics:

Don't worry about that extra line
That's creeping up upon your face
It's just a part of nature's way
To say you've grown a little more
Trees have rings and thicker branches
Kids shoes get a little tighter
Every year we're getting closer to who we're gonna be
It's time to celebrate the story of how you've come to be

Happy birthday my friend
Here's to all the years we've shared together
All the fun we've had
You're such a blessing
Such a joy in my life
May the good Lord bless you
And may all your dreams come true

So light a candle on your cake
For every smile you've helped create
For every heart and every soul
You've known to grow a little more
A few more pounds, a little more grey
Don't count the years just count the way
It takes a little time to go from water into wine
Don't ever lose the wonder of the child within your eyes

Happy birthday my friend
Here's to all the years we've shared together
All the fun we've had
It's such a blessing
Such a joy in my life
May the good Lord bless you
And may all your dreams come true

The Birthday Song - Corrinne May

Passion run (1 hr 35 min 56 sec)

2009-06-07T23:17:00.003+08:00

3rd attempt for this run. Again was not conditioned enough for it as I was working late in the previous 2 weeks
The temperature was warm and it was a new route, different from last year. At the end of it, am not satisfied with myself for not able to keep running all the way to the end. I was doing good time up to the 5km mark. It was after the 10km mark that I could not continue my pace.

My left knee did not feel well after the run, looks like I really have to watch my knee from being damaged further.

How do you feel God?

2009-05-29T00:16:00.006+08:00

Benjamin wrote the beautiful, simple and touching poetry below when the class was asked to write about God gift/power to them.

Pray that God bless His sweet child.

after note: Benjamin is a 6 year old boy. The simplicity and deep faith from this writing kid can move and touch so many adults.

Methods to extract information in the work place

2009-05-29T00:05:00.004+08:00

Method 1:
Works only if you are the superior, start with a dominating accusatory tone, put the person at defence. Words your statement ambiguously, let the person defends himself, repeat your wording accusatory and see how the person flows the information out.

Method 2:
To be used on peers. Start with open statements, wait for explanation, repeat same open statements, wait for expanded explanation, choose a particular clarification from the explanation, wait for explanation, repeat back same beginning open statement.

What can I says about the facts of life about works from the above?

West Coast Highway Route - 14km

2009-05-03T19:37:00.003+08:00

Almost got cancelled because it was raining in the morning. Supposed to be a 35km route. Decided to turn at the 6 km point. :)

05/03/2009 West Coast highway Route
Find more Runs in Singapore, Singapore

8 hours

2009-04-23T17:36:00.003+08:00

After reading Danny post on how we can pie each day into 3 slices of 8 hours each, it bring to sharp focus how much time we have time we have for ourselves and family each day, if we were to sleep 8 hour, work 8 hours, we will be left with 8 hour, take away 2 hours away for the small things in life that eat up time, ie. Travelling here , wait there, then we are essentially left with 6 hours to do own personal interest or
keep relationship alive.

Most people I know do not divide their time so equally, they usually work more than 8 hours, eating into sleep and personal time.

How do you spent your 6 hours?

Useful work excuses

2009-04-21T22:13:00.003+08:00

Some real-life reasons given for not able to stay late. Collected them over the span of a few weeks, guess it is somehow related to the roll-out happening now.

1) My wife birthday today.
2) My wedding anniversary today.
3) I am expecting guests in the house.
4) I have classes to attend today.

:)

Pukka Ice Creams (Again)

2009-04-19T23:27:00.005+08:00

Tried the place again, this time round, sampled Chocolate, Butter Scott and Banana flavour. Decided on Banana without any mix-ins. I always find the names to the flavours could be more original and less plain. Banana really taste banana and there were some banana chunks in it, I think.

Anyway, I still prefer Tom's Palette flavours any time any day.

Maleka April 4 - 5

2009-04-10T20:59:00.006+08:00

It was fun driving all the way there, the journey feels shorter and faster compared to the journey back.

And I keep smiling when I remember the way KK says his 1.5l car worked very hard to keep up with my. =D The joking expression on his face when he said it is priceless.

Even though we agreed to travel at 100km/hr, his car really worked hard to keep pace, maybe is the weight from all the eating and maybe it is the 2 x 5 kg of oil he had in his boot. (which he says is very cheap)

I like the adventure in exploring the unknown road and trying all the nyonya (authentic peranakan cuisine) food there. Aunty Lee still is the best, compared to Bibik Neo and Manis Sayang.

Bibik Neo Restaurant
No 4&6, Ground Floor,
Jalan Merdeka
Taman Melaka Raya
75000 Melaka
email: bibkneo@streamyx.com

Manis Sayang
617 Taman Melaka Raya
Malacca, Malacca
75000

Aunty Lee Restoran (THE BEST)
No 385, Jalan Ujong Pasir,
75050 Melaka
Tel: 06-283 1009 (Tue is rest day. Best to call after 930pm to make reservation)

Everyone enjoyed themselves with the food, and I am especially happy with the photos taken. I got many good looking photos, my friends looking happy and joyful. :) So much so, we talking about the next road trip.

Daily Misel 31 March 2009

2009-03-31T12:45:00.005+08:00

A reading from the book of Number:

From Mount Hor the children of Israel set out on the Red Sea road, to bypass the land of Edom. But with their patience worn out by the journey, the people complained against God and Moses, "Why have you brought us up from Egypt to die in this desert, where there is no food or water? We are disgusted with this wretched food!"

In punishment the LORD sent among the people fiery serpents,
which bit the people so that many of them died.
Then the people came to Moses and said,
"We have sinned in complaining against the LORD and you.
Pray the LORD to take the serpents away from us."
So Moses prayed for the people, and the LORD said to Moses,
"Make a saraph and mount it on a pole,
and whoever looks at it after being bitten will live."
Moses accordingly made a bronze serpent and mounted it on a pole,
and whenever anyone who had been bitten by a serpent
looked at the bronze serpent, he lived.

Responsorial Pslam

R. (2) O Lord, hear my prayer, and let my cry come to you.
O LORD, hear my prayer, and let my cry come to you.
Hide not your face from me in the day of my distress.
Incline your ear to me; in the day when I call,
answer me speedily.

R. O Lord, hear my prayer, and let my cry come to you.
The nations shall revere your name, O LORD,
and all the kings of the earth your glory,
When the LORD has rebuilt Zion and appeared in his glory;
When he has regarded the prayer of the destitute, and not despised their prayer.

R. O Lord, hear my prayer, and let my cry come to you.
Let this be written for the generation to come,
and let his future creatures praise the LORD:
"The LORD looked down from his holy height, from heaven he beheld the earth,
To hear the groaning of the prisoners, to release those doomed to die."

Sky so blue

2009-03-30T15:01:00.003+08:00

You wonder what prompted you to look up into the sky, and always when you do, it is always so clear, blue and bright. For all that happens under His sky, nothing can be hidden and you felt peace with a new unknown feelings when you looked at the sky.

Even when it feels heavy to do what needed to meld the path and hope it is done right. You pray for wisdom to see so and to know what else you failed to do so.

All these thoughts and feelings when your eyes moved upwards to the big wide blue sky.

He's just not that into you

2009-03-15T22:00:00.004+08:00

The show is enjoyable, entertaining and thought provoking. And its highlight sometimes, the kindness and affirmation of friend does more harm than necessary.

Considering the main actress as she struggle to understand if he is interested in her (he is not), her friends justifies and provides reason for his silence, stood by her and comforts her also. Their actions paints a false reality to her and gave her hope.

Personally, I prefer candour. The rawer the better. Especially, when it is really necessary, to shake me by the shoulder when I am not listening to his truth.

I understand most people chose the safer path, to stood by the friend and said what is necessary to help the friend to ease the pain. The necessary is usually the kinder, gentle and softer truth. Again, the softness depends on the character strength and fragility of the friend self-esteem.

Rare is the person who can accept the first time, the reality that pains him, as voiced by another.
Time does help to prepare the person, it is also make the reality that occurred not relevant any more.

Clementi Ave 2

2009-03-14T21:21:00.003+08:00

The food really tasted great, and the rating in term of deliciousness are, bee hoon goreng, mee goreng and nasi goreng. All from a malay stall at Clementi Ave 2 hawker stall. The stall is located at corner, facing a supermart, with the main road at its side. We waited approx 15 min before the food arrives and the food did not disappoints. Yes, the queue is long at this stall.

The ikan billis was crispy and melded well with the well fried nasi. The nasi was not too oily, just with a touch of oil, which was mixed well with the egg and beef. We tried the nasi first, followed by the bee hoon. The bee hoon was sweeter, blended better with the egg, beef and billias compared to the nasi. The nasi is just too grainly for me. The mee goreng was red in color, was not oily and fried just nicely with a hint of dryness.

It was a good outing with Will and Marg. They shared the good food with me and as usual, they shared their faith and spirit-fullness with me. Luckily this time round, I managed to not trigger Will into a sermon mode and the outing turned out enjoyable.

Also, Will introduced me to Fong Seng nasi lemark around the junction of Clementi Road and Pasir Panjang road.

From this and previous outing, Will and Marg are really simple, kind-hearted people who enjoyed simple hawker fare. And I can image them eating at resturants or more fancier places. And it is always so spirit enfulling when I am out with them.

Ethan

2009-03-08T21:28:00.002+08:00

Ethan is a quick-witted, smart and vocal boy. He shows his quick-wittiness by answering quickly and throwing any challenge back to the questioner. And his response shows intelligence. Behind that handsome sad young face, with a mixture of Malay and Arab feature, lies a child whose future can turn either way, good and bad.

If only he knows that imitating what he sees and hears without understanding the implication does not make him a better person. And he listen to you, this child needs lots of explanation on the outcome of his action and make him understand how he feels if the same unkind words he used is said back to him.

And they run screaming....

2009-02-28T20:18:00.003+08:00

Another class, another lesson, the children needs to be told how their behaviour affects others and then they will listen. Again, they run screaming to the toilet beside my attempts to send them in group of 3. Faintz!

In the next class, I plans to make the male tots queue up and be told how to do it right and proper, not to run, not to scream and act responsible. Just like I explains how I told one male tot that he should take responsible for what he said after the victim complained to me that he told her that she a pig, Kids are good naturally, some noisy, some quiet, some very shy and generally adorable. :)

Peezzeee

2009-02-26T19:06:00.003+08:00

It was simply amazing, funny and shocking at the same time, all of them fighting to pee into the 2 urinal is a memory I always remember.

When I asked them to queue and wait for their turn, they simply refused and want to be the first. Talk abt urgency. Controlling these tiny tots is a exercise in patience and self-control. And some of them really washes their hands. Faintz.

Luckily, none of them went missing during the toilet break and all reach back the class without any injury. I was so worried that the few naughty ones will run away while I scramble to and from those who finished peeing and those waiting their turn. Faintz! Faintz!

At the end of day, it was fun. My first lesson with Primary 1 kids for the catechist class. Luckily, Margate was a experienced teacher and knows how to manage them and control them. There still a long way for me to go before I can taking over a class, thou I be looking forward to it.

It is inspirational and so exciting that these tiny tots are so positive in life and they have so much to learn and pick up the right lessons to be better persons. And they are so impressionable, which is both a danger and a chance, that they may turn either way if placed in the wrong company and environment.

I be looking forward to the next class. Lent.

Kindness of Strangers

2009-02-20T15:21:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, a stranger do the simplest action that make you feel that the world is a kinder place. Like the kind stranger who passed me his unused parking coupon when I finished parking next to him, to the kind man who pass me his winning coupon for a free drink. The world does have people who treat other human with care, unselfishness and kindness.

Praise God! Let me have the strenght and loving heart to be a kind stranger also.

Udders Ice Cream

2009-02-16T21:39:00.007+08:00

Here another ice cream which have better layout and presentation, Ubbers is located in GoldHill Center and serves wonderful ice cream with their waffles. Their waffles with their ice cream is so delicious that I went for two rounds. :)

Their liquor flavours are strong with the liquor and blended very well overall. Their Bailey & Burbon really deserves the award given to it. I went there on a Sat night and it was crowded and packed. They are also famous for their durian flavour creation, thou I did not try any that night.

From memory, these are the flavours i ate. :)

Rum Rum Raisin : Simply love Rum taste in this. Not too strong, not too light.
Bailey & Burbon : Heavy Bailey melding very well with the burbon.
Lychee Martini : The lychee and Martini at the same time. Complementary each other.
Gila Melaka : Traditionally Gila taste, a refreshing asia touch.
Orange Choc Bitter: Yes, bitter and orangey at the same time!

Colleague's Wedding Photos

2009-02-11T21:54:00.002+08:00

It is a kinda of feeling that have lots of emotion mixed in it. The kind where all the emotions have equal strengths, pulling at my heart. Sad, envy and happy at the same time watching my colleague wedding photos and albums.

Sad and envy because I got reminded that a chance of my have past. Happy for my colleague because if is his happiness day of his life. The photos and video are excellently crafted together with a matching audio track bringing out the right emotions.

This feelings is the kind that reminded me of where I am now is because of a decision I made in the past. It is the "what if" questions that its bring along.

And it is always then I remember the reasons and rational that made me reach my decision. No regretfulness over being unfaithful adds strength to the fact that the love is only one-sided. Never will I let one lie remain unchallenged for it will always leads to many others.

And in this aspect, my wedding will be one full of praise and worship for my God. I have chosen the songs and the church. And I pray to the Lord not to let me wait too long for his chosen one for me.

No One Like You - Sarah Brightman & The London Symphony Orchestra

Pukka Ice Cream

2009-02-08T18:59:00.003+08:00

E recommend Pukka, seeing my recent entries about ice cream shop, telling me that it is even nearer to my home. The place is located at near the famous NUS prata stalls, after the 7-11.

It was pretty quiet and the flavours pretty normal, i.e. vanilla, horlicks, rum and raisin. I tried the rum and raisin and was shocked to find how heavy the rum is in the ice cream. Overall, it is money well spent thou it will not be one of my must go again place.

Be-Do-Have II

2009-02-08T18:21:00.003+08:00

One key factor to Be the person you aim to be is to improve one own self-awareness. This is the starting point. Being aware of how you doing it right, of how you are not doing the things you starts the discovery and search process of self-improvement.

It is not necessary to actually know what you not doing right or doing right, with time and multiple experiences and keeping your eyes/ears open and remembering what had occurred helps.

Just like the case of what is the proper response if someone eyes your other significant half, a confident, self-assured person will take it as a compliment that his choice is still attractive and she/he is with him. Maybe, a self self-assured person will be jealous of the attention by the other half. A debate may arise that the jealous response is normal and justifiable. I would agree and ask how a confident person with jealous feeling would react in this scenario?

The key take from the above is again self-awareness, being aware of your own feelings and the surrounding helps to bring a total picture view and increase the growth of self-improvement.

Barry Manilow -I can't smile without you.

Be-Do-Have

2009-02-03T22:58:00.002+08:00

It is a important concept to self-actualization of your goals.

Be the future person by starting to thinking like him. On the way, act out the actions and start behaving like the person to be. Then, you will start having the life of what you want to be.

It is easier to have a role model to copy from, thou I believe by thinking hard and increasing your self-awareness, you will discover the area of improvement. Then start Be, Do on those area of improvement.

It goes back to your life goals, area of work/family/community/self and in those areas finding the actions and thoughts to be the person you ultimately are.

Start with small achievable goals and build on the foundational from there.

My name not Tom

2009-02-02T21:50:00.004+08:00

"I named the store Tom's Palette to remind myself to work hard, to prove to Tom, my partner that a ice cream store is a feasible in Singapore. Even thought there are many ice cream brands in the supermarkets" He answered when I asked who is Tom.

So today, I tried the following delicious flavours, , Apple Pie (Yum! Yum!) and Granny Favourite (Always nice!) in a small cup while carrying a tub of creamy cheese cake,Pumpkin and ??.

Super Yum! Must try!

Tom's Palette

2009-01-28T14:46:00.007+08:00

And another traditional homemade ice cream can be found tucked away in Shaw Towers, with flavours like Granny Favourites, Lou Han Guo (i think). Tom's Palette made their own ice cream with less cream but with more milk and egg. Their prices are cheaper compared to Ice Cream Chefs even thou they are located in CBD area.

I like their friendlier services and even more creative and exotic flavours. They dun "cook" their creation which is not important for me. Texture and richness of taste is more important and is what they have. If you like, they allow you to choose two flavours to enjoy in one cup.

Compared to Ice Cream Chefs, this is my current favourite ice cream shop.

Ice Cream Chefs

2009-01-26T00:19:00.010+08:00

Once upon a time, someone excited me with a biz idea that touches on one of my favourite food. It is about turning the act of serving ice cream into a more restaurant experience. She took the idea from a ice cream franchises, named Cold Rock, in Australia.

The idea was to cook ice cream with customer chosen ingredients like MARS bars, candy, cereal flaks etc with their favourite ice cream. I was excited and wanted to plan how to bring it to Singapore. The idea died when I calculated the cost involved and my supposed be partner suddenly turned disinterested (maybe due to her father influence).

So it is a nice surprise when Princess bought me to this neat tiny place in Siglap that executed the idea above. Ice Cream Chefs is run by mostly young adults/teenagers and it is always crowded the two times I been there. Here, the ice cream is home made and they "cook" the ice cream with your choice of toppings.

Here a picture of the cooking tool on a very cold stone. :)

The favour changes often and I chose a mocha favour mixed with cashew nuts. The ice cream is creamy and well-mixed, soft and blended nicely. Overall, a enjoyable experience.

Likely, will go back again and to scout out the food around the siglap area.

Lessons in Work

2009-01-22T00:42:00.003+08:00

Before I joined this company, a friend wished me the best of luck. And another predicted one year of services will be good enough.

From the past year, there many lessons learnt. Not much on technical but many on politics skills and manipulative tactics. In an environment where people move behind your back (even bosses) to create a situation of uncertainty, the ones who can stand up to meet boss demands are the ones who move ahead even if they are unable to deliver and do not really understand how to deliver.

To survive means to learn fast, recruit allies and adapt quickly. It is amazing that the company can still continues to move forward in such environment. And I sometimes wonder would I even perform better given what I learnt now in my previous company.

I believe God placed me here to toughen me for His work ahead. And praise Him for faithfulness and believe in me to do His work.

Amen.

Jan 2009

2009-01-22T00:15:00.004+08:00

How time quickly flies and CNY about to start soon, finally found a chance to catch up with SY. His work situation looks glim as sales are dropping and the company may run out of cash soon. He is mentally prepared and planning for alternatives in 6 month times. From him, it seem some of my classmates have fallen on bad times also.

Both of us agree is matter be mentally prepared and thinking positively to move ahead for better or worse, it is that fighting attitude that determine a man success in life.

We even joked about how to save on parking, he can park his car on the park near his home. :)

And I agreed that as long as each of us think hard for a solution to feed oneself and be mentally strong in face of challengces and setup, there nothing stopping a person from moving forward.

Transfer Emoticons to another machine

2009-01-11T17:19:00.003+08:00

It was a pain to realized my fav emoticons may be lost and I will not able to use my cute picture during msn. My situation came about when my previous notebook hard disk crashed. Luckily, I was able to salvage essential files out, including my emoticons.

The next step was to find a way to copy them back into the msn in my new notebook. After some googling, I found that the emoticons files are stored in the following directory

WinXP:
C:\Documents and Settings\Owner\Local Settings\Application Data\Microsoft\Messenger\\ObjectStore\CustomEmoticons

Thou, the directory above is not exactly the same in Vista (my new notebook)

Vista:
C:\Users\\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Messenger\\ObjectStore\CustomeEmoticons

And I have to turn on "Show Hidden Folders and Files" folder option to find AppData directory.

A simple copy of the directoy to new notebook and restarting my MSN did not work to show my emoticons. The alias key works but a blank emoticon is shown. It seem that MSN protects the emoticons by encrypting them. So a simple copy will not work.

Again, thanks to google, there is a tool to backup and restore all msn files. MSNBackup is a free tool that works for MSN 8.1 and MSN Live Messenger.

So here the steps I look to transfer and install back my emoticons into my new notebook.

Rename my current Vista CustomEmoticons to temp name.
Copy the previous CustomEmoticons to the Vista location.
Started MSNBackup.
Enter my hotmail ID and passport ID. (Passport ID is found at the bottom of this page.
https://account.live.com/EditProf.aspx?mkt=en-us&rp=Profiles. )
Start the backup.
Rename back the Vista CustomEmoticons to its original name.
Start the restore.
Voila! Emoticons transfer ed from one previous msn to my new msn.

=)

Museum of Broken Relationship

2009-01-11T02:18:00.002+08:00

On display at the Jendela threater of Espandale is a roving exhibition of memtos of gifts/items representing failed relationship. Some are very cryptic, like the series of bras with notes attached that leave an unexplained story.

Some are so touching and sad, like the case of a boy realized his love can be because his girl loves women more. And vice versa, the sketch drawing of 2 naked men by a girl marks her realization that her love is gay.

The most touching is the single metal green key, one of the many gifts to his love. Only upon his death, did she realized his refusal to have sex is of how much he loved her to prevent from her being infected with his AIDS illness.

Another sad, sharp and brunt story was of a mobile phone send to a girl from her boyfriend to mark the end of their relationship by saying never to call him again.

Different stories, different hurts and haunting memories of past affections litters across the exhibition. By the end, one leaves the place with a feeling of how fragile is love and how warm glow of love items easier turns to memtos of anger, tears and sorrow when the feeling is gone.

Love is conditional

2008-12-19T01:14:00.004+08:00

It is so wonderful and sweet to believe love is unconditional. But the truth is love is always conditional.

Even God will get anger over those who does not follows his way. Even God will not love his negative counterpart. Even God will punish those who are wicked. So how could we mere moral be even better than Him. How could we gives unconditional love.

For it is human nature to stop loving someone whom treat them unkindly, it is just a matter of time before that person decides enough is enough. Everyone have a limit.

Then is there some truth in unconditional love. Maybe there is, maybe when you will never intentionally hurt your loved one, maybe when you sincerely apologies when you unwittingly did and maybe when you always be aware of your own action on her.

For the one who deserve your relationship will never let you cry.

And now how I wish I respond better to those who had cried.

Howie Day - Collie

Natalie & Natasha

2008-12-16T22:08:00.003+08:00

Two beautiful, young and very confident young gals. They were travelling with their parent, part of the tour group I belong to. I am stuck by how cheerful and well-mannered they are. They are sensible beyond their age and their level of maturity is impressive.

And I believe it is the result of how well their parent have bought them up. During the trip, I see in action how their dad make use of situation to supplement a particular trait of their daughter. Always supporting Natasha in her decision and training her to be confident. And always there to give a little push to Natalie to express her feelings and confidence.

And it is amazing at the result, and I confident that they will grow up to be beautiful people and a plus to their friends. And a inspiration to me.

Turkey Nov 25 - Dec 5

2008-12-08T00:47:00.002+08:00

Ever changing landscape, from flat plains, rolling hills, to historic ruins is Turkey. In 11 days, we saw Istanbul, Dardanellus, Trojan Horse, Ayvalik, Ephesus, Virgin Mary Shrine, Hierapolis, Pamukkale, Whirling Dervishes, Cappadocia, Anaka, Sanfrabolu and finally home.

Total number of pics exceeding 288 and still counting...

A good rest and trip.

Nokia e51 sms message counter

2008-11-25T10:53:00.004+08:00

As E51 uses Symbian S60 3rd Edition OS and all phones that uses this OS does not have the sms counter. So I figure out that someone out there must must be frustrated by this and had written a application to solve this.

It turns out finding a message/sms counter for E51 is more work than expected. After several false start, I found one that works,

FreiMinMon : a application with German UI. (Translated Page here)

And to make FreiMinMon runs, Python must to be installed. The Python link in the FreiMinMon pages does not work. Luckily, a quick google search leads to Nokia implementation of Python, Py60. The necessary S60 Python files can be downloaded here.

Follow through with FreMinMon installation and ta da, you have a free message counter for E51

Other application I tried is SMS Counter but it fails to load on my E51. Maybe it will work for other Symbian S60 OS, do let me know as it have English UI.

Also, tried PBC SMS Counter from Nokia MOSH website (for Nokia "vetted" third part software). However, it requires payment to use and it is really silly that the downloaded trail version is expired.

E51 minus

2008-11-24T01:04:00.005+08:00

E51 have several minus which personally I feel if corrected, will make it a even better phone. The first is lack of sms counter, there no ways to track the amount of sms sent.

What is available in a count of both send and received sms which does not tell you much how much you have send or received. It seem it a fault at the Symbian OS level which the phone based on.

Luckily there available free application that provide the missing function.

The other is its handfree function, you have to wait for the call to be connected before the handfree function can be activated. That mean you have dail the number you wanted and press a 2nd time to activate the handfree function. You have to look at the phone to activate it. That a chore when I am driving. In my previous 6320i, I can activate the handfree function once I start dailing.

With these in mind, my next phone must have not these minus. Little things like this are what make the overall experiences better, in this case poorer.

opportunity in recession

2008-11-16T02:03:00.002+08:00

Given the current world wide economic crisis, the takeaway from it is there will be at least min 3 recession in ones lifetime. So with this knowledge, financial planning becomes more of knowing of creating plans for the different phase in a economic cycle.

Whether to save and then invest during a recession is maybe a too extreme plan, thou it have a simple and elegant logic to it.

The current crisis wipe out more than 20% in a person investment, considering if a financial plan have a target rate of 10%. This different is very painful to bear to that person. So the question is than readjust for target rate, given this occurrence.

There a lesson to learn here.

English to Chinese Google Style

2008-11-15T00:01:00.002+08:00

Come across this neat tool that tanslate English to Chinese and vice versa. It is a partnership between Google and a famous E-C Chinese dictionary in China.

http://g.iciba.com/

Using a mouse over, its provides the chinese version of a english or vice versa. It translates whole paragraphs too and have a voice pronunciation feature too.

Simply loving it.

Stuff from Past

2008-11-09T01:11:00.003+08:00

Clearing the old cupboard, throwing away memories, keeping those with sentimental value is a mental exercise of deciding what to keep and what to let go.

Items from false friendships are the easiest to be swollen by the dust bin. You wonder why you keep them so long, maybe cos you never have a need to house clean until now.

Greeting cards, photos and letters from time of a younger you surprise you by how kind, sweet, and intense is the memory from a time when life is less hectic and a very blur you are.

The sweetest are a bunch of letters from a friend about her suffering in the last days of her study. Reading them bring a smile to your face and how you could had done more to help her. She is happier now, flying between HK and SG, following her hubby. Quietly, you filed them away, locking away a evidence of past memories for future enjoyment and potential smile.

Next, photos from a birthday outing with a crush bring a smile to your face . You wonder if you should keep them, for the married her look the same as before in that photo and you silly entertained the thought of asking her if she wants them. Laughing quietly, you tenderly close the small album and move it to the same pile of stuff to flow into the dust bin.

The most difficult are those that evoke a double feelings of happiness past and deep pain now. Keeping means assigning to them and remembering those special happy moments in the past and yet feeling the deep pains that they bring now. You can decides that you can either drop them away into a deep storage, to be discovered and to be decide again in the future or simply discard them now.

You never realise how sentimental you are until you see the amount of memories and stuff you have around once they are unpacked. You smiled as you realised that you are not alone as most human are sentimental to certain degree.

Some stuff to be kept and some stuff to be clear so that the new ones can came in.

Memorable Quote for Christian Life

2008-10-25T12:31:00.001+08:00

Promises made to God when sick require a better memory than some people possess.

by Tyndale House Publishers

Three

2008-10-19T10:21:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday, Beautiful Invisible.

10 min

2008-10-13T23:19:00.005+08:00

10 mins, that the amount of time it takes for you to reach home now. Man controlling the machine in harmony, switching lane, weaving from vehicle to the next, listening to your favourite song and moving at 100 km/h is a thrill that you enjoy at night along AYE.

You laugh because you remember to try a different style of acceleration to get better fuel economy. A kind of game where you play to get the most from your machine.

You laugh again as it felt right, getting this machine even though it was a vain decision. There is a certain freedom gain, for Singapore have become smaller and distance is question of how soon. Now, empty highway at night is a temptation to speed.

You remember that statistically, somewhere long time ago, the 3rd month of car insurance have the most accident because in that month is where the beginner drivers abandon their carefulness. It is now the 3rd month for you now and you laugh if you will become another part of the statistic.

Dear Guardian angel, be with me, to guide, to light my stride. Thank you for protecting me in my past and future journey. Amen!

In your presence - Chris De Silva

Isaiah 43:18-19

2008-10-11T23:39:00.001+08:00

A new start, a new name and the beginning of a lifelong journey. Feeling alive, happy and gladness after the flow of water mark this new start.

18 "Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.

19 See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland.

The Heart of Worship - Charlie Hall

Forgiveness

2008-09-29T23:23:00.006+08:00

Among the stories shared over dinner last night, the story of Will baby was the most touching and hurting.

"I will never go back to St. Bernadette again. My baby died and the priest do not want to come down and perform the last rites." Will said. Mar was almost in tears as she remembers.

Will, eye shining brightly and his voice louder than normal, asked "How do we know he is send off to heaven now?"

Will then shared, in his month of grief, he sought and got an audience with the archbishop. Will requested that the archbishop the priests gave the last rites even if the person is died. Archbishop, full of empathy for Will lost baby, asked where Will wife was, and then said a prayer for Will and Mar baby journey, which somewhat healed Will cries for sympathy.

I believe it is true for everyone have a special something deep within their heart, that if is not given, make forgiveness very hard for the person.

And sometimes, the party that did the hurt, do not know how deep the cut is or do not even know that they performed a cut. And that is the sadness part because how does apologies start the process of forgiveness. And in the midst of reconciliation, it is even harder to remember the 5 languages of apology.

And the story also taught me priest are human too beside their closeness to God, they too need human care, touch and forgiveness.

Chris De Silva - Lord. Have Mercy

Mamma Mia!

2008-09-27T20:54:00.005+08:00

I laughed myself out at this movie. The entertaining script and cute lead actress with seasoned supported actors and actress make the movie enjoyable. And I came away, wanting to hear more about Abba songs and to check out their lyrics. Wikipedia have a good list of songs used in the movie.

If the Broadway show does came back again, I will pay money to watch it again. :)

GRASP

2008-09-20T14:38:00.003+08:00

Last Tuesday, I attended a talk by Dr. Melanie Billings on "Negotiation for Success" in DBS Auditorium. She was a every entertaining speaker and make the 2 hour talk very engaging and interesting. She presented her framework for negotiation as GRASP.

G = Goal
R = Route
A = Legitimate Argument
S = Substitute
P = Persuasive

The key insight I take from the talk is to not let anyone "Bear" you. By that, means do not let people wore you down with illegitimate argument, all negotiation must be based on fair standard.

Always ask for a reason for the request if the argument is not fair and say refuse otherwise to co-operate.

Signs

2008-09-16T23:09:00.002+08:00

Wil: Whenever you made a decision, think thru with your human mind. Weight the pro and con and then make a objective decision. Pray to God then, explaining how you reach your decision and ask a sign to understand if it is the right decision as according to his plan.

Wil: He will give you signs, thru people / events that either smoothen or block you from moving forward. If it does not came the way u expects, then it is time to pray more and ask for understanding to discern His ways.

Guardian Angel Prayer

2008-09-13T00:21:00.002+08:00

Oh Angel of God, my Guardian dear
To whom His love commits me here
Ever this day be at my side
To light and guard, to rule and guide.

Amen.

Who's Holding Donna Now - Debarge

2008-09-08T21:30:00.003+08:00

This song came to me these past weeks, echoing what I felt in my heart. It was dear Princess that finally said the right words to make me reflect and find what I have failed to really do, after all I had done this year to move on.

It is liberating to find that something that kept me from really moving on, that something which is the reason why I keep failing in my relationships in this year, that something that stirred in me turmoil (which shouldn't have occurred) when Donna is getting married.

Even when I know each gal is different and should be treated differently, I was hoping to find in them the magic that rekindle that delight of not having speaking my desire in words.

Hoping to find magic should be just a sweet additional and not finding it should not be a criteria at all. Each person is a universe and the ability to empathise and expressing your innermost feelings without tiring is a skill that needs constant practice and countless attempts.

That discovery of Donna was a delightful surprise in the start but in the end, with hindsight, best not to be found because she make me a less expressive person and the avoidance of countless hours of finding my core again. Saying goodbye without giving her a chance to make a choice between him and me is something I will never know if it is a wise move. I do know that it was made after much thought and inner searching to realize her love is false.

I do not know now what her role in God plan for me. Maybe I will know in the future. But I do know God answered my prayer by sending Princess to ask me to be more daring and to be more expressive in order to grow as a person. Both points I know already but Princess said in the right time to gave it the deepest impact.

So its time to do what needs to be done. To change the song and dance to a new tune and future.

Viva La Vida - Coldplay

Guardian Angel

2008-08-28T23:31:00.003+08:00

"Everyone have a guardian Angel. You just cant see them." Di trying convince me when she saw my face unbelieving look. She told me to read Padre Pio story to understand more.

And my guardian angel did appear that day in the form of a old man on bicycle who signalled me how to perform the reverse parking in the tight geylang loyang 11 street.

Beauty is everywhere once you open our eyes to see it. Amen.

People never forgets

2008-08-28T23:26:00.004+08:00

I found the following quote to be very true.

People will forgets what you say
People will forgets what you did
But people will never forget how you made them feel.

And I remember it is always so easy to remember those sad, difficult feelings over those happy, joyful ones. So have you create good feelings to your loved ones and the people around you.

Second Crush

2008-08-25T23:36:00.004+08:00

10 years ago, MK caused your heart to jump. The first sight of her, standing there in the narrow canteen, sunlights streaming a halo thru her hair, is a sight you remembered forever. You never understand what about her that caused you to like her.

The same her sitting across you have not changed much physically, only slightly slimmer. She came dress simply in a white cotton T with blue denim skirt. As you traded life stories, you noticed that she have become more vocal and more direct than before. You not sure if your comparison is accurate as you realized your memory is fuzzy.

You realized now that her direct, to the point, speaking her mind style makes it easy and attractive to a younger you to like her. A older you realized how you admired her self-confidence and confident of what life works for her and what does not. A wiser you wonders if the confidence and self-confidence is a act from many years of practice.

When you asked her why there no children so far, her darting eyes tell you it is sensitive question to her and then you learn that is a sign that any answer from her will be political correct one.

As you parted, you agreed to keep in touch even thou you realized it is getting harder for you to meet people from your past who have progress on in life stages.

Gravity - You are I am

Gal never ask questions with simple intention

2008-08-12T23:08:00.004+08:00

"Do you think I am beautiful by Singapore standard?" SL ask bluntly after I told her that she can speak frankly.

"Yes, you are. You have sweet looking eyes with a nice small face. You are well-toned, from your constant swimming. You are attractive." I smile as I answered.

It is much later that I realized her question may be more than just a simple question seeking my opinion. It could be her asking for my opinion of her beauty. I will never know if it is what I suspected because I do not want to know as it will ruin for me the delicate balance between our friendship. For I could not behave myself in the same way toward her again.

The Perishers - Pills

House Bound Mass: Roman 9:1-5

2008-08-12T22:43:00.003+08:00

As I sat there, far from her, away from my sight, yet her slow low voice, cry out with so much appreciation, wonder, love that caught everyone attention.

"Brothers and sisters:
I speak the truth in Christ, I do not lie;
my conscience joins with the Holy Spirit in bearing me witness"

Her voice breaking, choking on invisible tears, continues...

" that I have great sorrow and constant anguish in my heart.
For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ"

She sobs and making great efforts to continue, trying hard to voice out the words that touches her so deeply, trying hard to finish her role in mass.

"for the sake of my own people..."

Unable to finish, her attempts to breath back her tears, her attempts to stop her sobbing, sound out loudly across the hall.

She is a old lady, house-bound, bought over by an volunteer, taking part in a Mass for people like her. Another younger volunteer took over her and finished the passage.

Today reading is more touching, more wonderful than all previous reading I heard, for it was spoken by someone immediately touched by the love of our God. Even though she is not able to complete the reading, her voice showed her faith and love. It is not what is spoken but what came from the heart. And today, her heart spokes.

Amen.

Mount Faber BIB 1838 01:02:21

2008-06-26T20:47:00.003+08:00

It is simply amazing that I completed 10 km in about an hour time. Mount Faber 10km with its long slopes. And I did not really push myself in doing it. Gosh, given a flat route, I may able to finish 10km is less than 1 hour. Then a marathon (42km) could be finished in about 4 hours.

Amazing! Thinking about it.

One thing for sure is I got change my current pair of running shoe. My ASIC Nimbus 9 is not cut for long distance running.

The world is a stage

2008-06-22T21:48:00.002+08:00

Growing older, meeting new people, going thru familiar emotions in new places does bring a certain wonder and realisation that the world is a stage.

Regardless of what they say about how no two person are alike, you tends to find there are certain class of people with the same way of thinking, responding in the same way to the same triggers even when they are two different persons.

It a certain wonder that someone out there will have realized much earlier and make good use of it. Hopefully, for the good and not the bad.

Life Choices

2008-06-21T12:11:00.004+08:00

Sometimes, you know you need time to make a choose from the two. Time to understand both of them better. To find who they are inside. You thought it will be just one of them in the end because you are tired of searching and will make the best of what is available.

For one who is more closer to your life values but is a workaholic and more in love with her job. You know you will be always be second priority in her life with work right in front of you. You are happy when she talked about changing her life priority but that all talks and no real action.

The other who you enjoy better conversations and in doing so, discovers that she may just needs a companion and you wonders if she is really to settle down. And the doubts prevented you to return her feelings. Maybe, if you have spoken honestly and sincerely to her, it would somewhat bridge the gaps that was created. Then when you tried, it was too late.

You began with a good starts and finished with none of them. Its surprised you that it is neither.
Time do help you to find out more about a person and this episode taught you it is best to talk what is in your heart instead of waiting for tomorrow to say it.

Kim Wilde - Four Letter Word

Pain blinded her and drained her friend sympathy

2008-06-11T22:53:00.003+08:00

How do you comfort a gal who is in so much pain? That even if she can hear the advise and encouragement from her friend, she is ignoring them?

So blinded by pain that she failed to see her constant negativity is cutting a rift in her friendships. Her stubbornness in believing in her own perception of what happening.

Unable to see that she is the innocent party, unable to see he is the liar, unable to see that her strong desire to reunite is blinding her clarity in thinking, unable to see that she is caught in downward spiral toward total despair.

How do you comfort a gal who is in so much pain? I guess you cant. Except to be wait for her to wake up. And be there to help her climb out of that spiral she had dug herself in.

BIB 796 15km 01:33:22

2008-06-10T22:54:00.004+08:00

2nd time and a longer distance, the experience was different, less enjoyable compared to last year. It is not the weather, for it was cooler and beezer this year. It is not the longer distance, for last year shorter distance was tougher.

Maybe, it is this year run reminds me how much one year had since past. From then to now, so much happened, so much more compared to 2 years ago. So much more on the personal front.

An older eyes and a reflecting mind saw the same running route differently. Knowing the way of route leads means knowing how far away the ending is. But in life, how often do you know where one path ends and another begins?

Did I secretly wished that the end of the race means the end of the current road I am travelling now? Nope.

:) It is have faith and to trust in God that all will be well, for he is a good God.

In the end, I got to meet up with some people I lost touch with and gained a new friend.

ps: the first 5 km was not too tough, it the last 5km that was really a struggle. I am quite surprised I am able to clock 1hr 33 min even when I half walk and run in the last 3 km. It will be a better and faster timing if I had trained more to improve my stamina.

Taxis driver

2008-06-07T22:29:00.003+08:00

He spoke in a fluent, elegant and perfect English. His slim frame and angular face fit well in coolie environment. From his speech, I know he is not the typical taxis driver, he is someone who is well educated and have more experience compared to me. Yet, he is driving me in his well-worn nondescript SMRT car to my destination.

"I am happier now. Responsible for myself only and occasionally have nice customer, like you, to talk to and share our thoughts. I used to have 80 people working under me and I did not enjoy it. I decided to wing up the company and do this. I am a more happy person now." He said.

Dai Lama said life purpose is to be happy. How true it is. It does not take riches or high position to be happy. Material things only bring ephemeral joy. To be positive and happy is all in the mind.

Life Fragility

2008-05-24T10:04:00.003+08:00

"I remember that day, how I messed up his hair and told him to watch out for my things and not fall asleep by the swimming pool. Of how in the same morning, he was able to take over me when I was exhausted after 15min of tennis."

"Then he was gone, in that same day afternoon, it was so sudden. His heart just failed. It really make you think about fragile and short life is. And in the funnel, of how everyone remember him not what he do for a living, not of how much money he have, but his sweetness, kindness and easy-going person."

"So nowadays, I decided that life is too short to not do the things you afraid to do."

LSR shared the above with me as we having our dinner. Her words ring true as someone life is not measured by what he does , it is about how people remember the person. And I wonder if the recent events is God teaching me something about life. To not too held up and focus on my career.

Golden Handshake

2008-03-28T09:19:00.005+08:00

Met up with Miss Chee for lunch the other day, she still looked good and attractive, just like in her uni days. She is still upbeat even when we talking about her coming golden handshake.

The company she worked since graduation have decided to cut cost and move her work duties to Thailand. She saw the signs and knows it is coming. And she have set her own expectation to receive a 50% pay-cut as she starts her search. With her years of experiences, she is over-qualified for the jobs she is searching for. One alternative that she exploring is to start her own biz. Overall, is to move away from IT which I can relate to.

And as we talked, I realized how true it is to have alternative plans in place, in case life throws unexpected humps along the work. Not only about the industry one choose for the first career and the different role one can play in it. But also about the long term end target. A 2nd "career" after the retirement of the first career, an activity which can keep me occupied in my evening years.

Making Relationships works

2008-03-23T00:14:00.002+08:00

Read this excellent article written by Dr Gottman. Belows are several interesting paragraphs that I find enjoyable and very true.

I actually analyzed about 900 arguments last summer. With the help of the lab staff, I interviewed people about their fights—we saw them fighting in the lab and then outside the lab, and we talked about the issue. What we learned from measuring all these interactions is that most people fight about nothing. Their fights are not about money, or sex, or in-laws—none of that stuff. The vast majority of conflicts are about the way people in the relationship fight.
...

"Something that’s been so hard for me to convey to the media is that trivial moments provide opportunities for profound connection. For example, if you’re giving your little kid a bath and he splashes and you’re impatient, you miss an opportunity to play with him. But if you splash back and you clean up later, you have some fun together and you both get really wet, laugh, and have a beautiful moment. It’s ephemeral, small, even trivial—yet it builds trust and connection. In couples who divorce or who live together unhappily, such small moments of connection are rare."

...

He and his wife had a new baby and were fighting a lot. Then after work one day, he and his coworkers went out to celebrate a really successful quarter at the company. Everybody had a good time. People eventually started to go home, but this man and a female coworker lingered. They were talking about the excellent fourth quarter earnings, and she said, “You know, George, this is the happiest I’ve seen you in months.” Nothing untoward was happening, but he was enjoying the conversation in a way that he hadn’t with his wife in a long time. So on the way home, he thought to himself, “You know, we laughed and shared a lot, and it was kind of intimate, and I should really go home and say, ‘Nancy, I’m really kind of worried because I just had a conversation with a woman at work, and I felt closer to her than I’ve felt to you in months, and it scares the hell out of me, and we need to talk.’” But he knew exactly how his wife would react. She’d tell him to grow up and would say, “Hey, I have this baby sucking at my teats and now you’re being a baby, too. I don’t need this kind of crap from you, so just suck it up and get on with it. You’re a new father, and quit having those conversations with that woman at work.” So he decided not to share the experience with his wife because, he thought, “Nothing really happened anyway.” But something did happen, and now he’s got a secret. That’s the beginning of betrayal.
....

What contributes to a successful long-term relationship?

Look for the positive in each other. Robert Levenson, of the University of California at Berkeley, and I are in the 18th year of a 20-year longitudinal study in the San Francisco Bay area. We have two groups of couples who were first assessed when they were in their forties and sixties and are now, respectively, in their sixties and eighties. The surprising thing is that the longer people are together, the more the sense of kindness returns. Our research is starting to reveal that in later life your relationship becomes very much like it was during courtship. In courtship you find your new partner very charming and positive. It was all so new then. You de-emphasized the negative qualities and magnified the positive ones. In the long term, the same thing happens. You say, “She’s a wonder woman. She can get us through anything.” For instance, my wife and I have just moved out of the house we lived in for 14 years, and she orchestrated the entire thing. She was amazing. My genius was to sit back and say nothing. In good relationships, people savor the moments like this that they have together.

Text Messages

2008-03-15T23:27:00.002+08:00

Strange, recently, I prefer talking to people face to face rather than via text messaging or emails. To hear their voice, their tone, pitch and pace conveys more meaning to a talk between two person that those electronic devices can never provides.

I wonder why have changed to cause me to prefer this.

The loved one OR photo of the loved one.

2008-03-09T22:00:00.004+08:00

When you look at a photo of a loved one, the love you feel is for loved one and not for the one in the photo. So easy to understand. It is the memory of the loved one that the photo reminds you of your love to her.

So easy to understand. In the context of the Christian religion, what would be your reply if you see a person praying to a statue? Is the person praying to a statue or to the loved one the person think of when he see the statue?

Only the person will know.

Company Size does matter

2008-02-20T22:47:00.004+08:00

Beside all that shits and knife dodging in a job, it all cames down to the CV, a single sheet of paper that sells for you before you present yourself to do the selling. Ignoring that its have full of accomplishments, its promote and make achievements shine, there are other matters that are seldom talked and are factors when HR review yr CV

1) the progressive size of the company (in term of market cap) in your career. A employer will always prefer someone from a big company over a smaller company even if the same person have the same achievements. Yes, it is sad fact of life. There are exception but these are only exception for those few excellent individual who is able to sell themselves personally AFTER their CV passed the first filter

2) if you moved from coy (market cap of 1M) to the same position of another coy (market cap of 1B), it a "promotion". The same position of a large company carries bigger job scope and bigger responsibilities. It looks better in CV and HR people recognize it.

It is also a "promotion" if you moved to smaller company but of much higher position.

Therefore, a strategy to climb the corporate ladder, is to start from big company and then move to smaller (in higher position) company.

ps: If you move from a smaller company, no HR will risk letting you be in a equivalent or higher position from where you came from.

Which Industry?

2008-02-13T23:06:00.002+08:00

For career planning, beside knowing your strengths is not enough. To be focus, it is better to stay within a particular industry. And it is wrong to see IT as one industry. It is a very bad representation and very inaccurate description.

IT in banks is different from IT in vendors and I suspects is different from other part of the economy. Architects in Bank plays the role of innovators and is at the leading edge of technology. They investigate new technologies and establish the best practice and standards in using them. They ensure and inspects the development team that took over using the standards and best practice.

So staying in one industry for the long term works best for career as employers values a CV with long track record. The question is then finding out which industry provides the best environment to exhibits your strengths and interest.

Talking to tons of people will help and I believe trying multiple different company in the early years of your career will add to your experiences in deciding where to go and where to stay.

5km only

2008-01-24T22:26:00.000+08:00

Running around Mt Farber twice (approx 10 km) was a typical normal running route and I found it incredible that completing even one round is such a difficult and exhausting task. It is not the first time but my 3rd attempt since the marathon.
Being so quickly out of shape just one month after the marathon is a surprise and shock to me. I really got to be persistence and regular at it to keep in running shape. Plus, got to watch my knees and not get them damaged so much.

Changing job

2008-01-21T23:02:00.001+08:00

Recently, several very senior managers jumped ship together. The rumor mill says they left for Barclay. The most senior have a 30 years history with the company.

I wonder if they can adapt to the different culture in Barclay. Maybe their senior position helps somewhat. Their movement trigger in me a need to re-examine my decision to make it work in this company and not change job again forever. No, there is no deep unhappiness. It is just wise to observe and evaluate surrounding changes constantly. Even if I do nothing, the world still changes around me.

I think the operating word is Forever, maybe I should not have said not change job forever but to constantly watch on the key factor of supervising manager and compare it what is available out there. And to learns the skill of reading a person character quickly.

Nickelback - Far Away

What she taught me...

2008-01-06T23:16:00.000+08:00

It feels like deja-vu, the dodgy relationship is full of up and down over her army of suitors. And she could not understand it is not what they do or how many of them, it is her response to them that brothers me. For all her touching care and sweet kindness, what I needed most now is a open and transparent communication between us.

And from it all, I realized I would and could not do these because I could not. I simply could not. And then I realized I must because a gal will love her bf more if he did.

That a guy will stand tearing outside her home begging for her love. Not just one.
That older man offered her a unlimited card, 5K monthly, a condo and a car to be his gf.

Things that I would never do and could not do, and earning the first lessons of the new year. That while care is important, it does not really work for me compared to open, honest and transparent communication.

Last Christmas

2007-12-24T15:22:00.000+08:00

Last Christmas, we watched a forgettable movie at vivocity and had dinner at our favorite restaurant. She was not happy when I told her I will be in HK for a conference in Jan'07. She sulked and that spoiled the Christmas dinner. We finished our dinner quietly and left early because she wanted to return home.

She brighten up on the way to the bus stop, wanting to be with me longer. However, my xmas cheers was gone and was not in the mood to response. I did not bring myself to think how to turn the occasion to be better. It was the start of the downhill of our relationship from there.

Next time, maybe, for whatever the next girl will be, I must be stronger and find out the cause of the sulking and try to make Xmas a season of cheers and forgiveness.

21 more days to 2008

2007-12-09T22:16:00.000+08:00

During the unfortunate episode with my last company, a kind anonymous left a note saying there were 3 more month left and things will work out. And things did turn out decent in the job area for me so far. Thank you, kind stranger.

It is 21 more days to 2008 and with it coming will closes one of the most difficult year in my life. And in the meantime, I pray that events will make the closing be better than the beginning in this remaining days.

In a way, the difficult period taught me many lessons about faith, trust and friendship. Of who are my true friends, of how faith is eternal and faithful, of how trust is such a fragile thing that once broken can never be repaired, amened or replaced.

'Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, our kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one"

BIB 27705 2 hr 16 min

2007-12-02T21:28:00.000+08:00

My nipples hurts, a sensation and experience that is new and interesting. Not helping least is the running water makes it tingle and snare. After some thought, the cause points towards the Adidas running shirtlet that I wore for the 21.1km run today. It is the first time I am wearing the official Stanchart shirtlet. And it must be the rubbing against the shirt during the run that cause the abrasion.

Thinking back, sticking 2 $10 notes in my short pockets and leaving the home carrying nothing except what i wear was a reckless and simple-minded way to start the race.

Anyway, the run started at 6.15am and after 2hr 16 min, I finally reached the Finish line. And it is good that my strategy of drinking at every drink stop works. The result of using the mental strength of enduring the pain is my knees hurts when I walk now, so it will be couple of months before I run again.

Come to think of it, I better stick to run that are < 21km

5 Philosophies of Life

2007-11-20T00:28:00.000+08:00

An wise kind man send me this.

1)
DON'T LET SOMEONE BECOME A PRIORITY IN YOUR LIFE...
WHEN YOU ARE JUST AN OPTION FOR THEM.....

2)
NEVER CRY FOR ANY RELATION IN LIFE
BECAUSE FOR THE ONE WHOM YOU CRY
DOES NOT DESERVE YOUR TEARS

AND THE ONE WHO DESERVES
WILL NEVER LET YOU CRY.........

3)
TREAT EVERYONE WITH POLITENESS
EVEN THOSE WHO ARE RUDE TO YOU,

NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT NICE
BUT BECAUSE YOU ARE NICE........

4)
NEVER SEARCH YOUR HAPPINESS IN OTHERS
WHICH WILL MAKE YOU FEEL ALONE,
RATHER SEARCH IT IN YOURSELF
YOU WILL FEEL HAPPY EVEN IF YOU

5)
HAPPINESS ALWAYS LOOKS SMALL
WHEN WE HOLD IT IN OUR HANDS.

BUT WHEN WE LEARN TO SHARE IT,
WE REALIZE HOW BIG AND PRECIOUS IT IS! .....

Marina Bay route

2007-11-18T19:26:00.000+08:00

Hit the wall around 7 and 8 km mark, my pace slow down considerably and there no drinking point because there no petrol station in the route. Drinking was possible till I reached the new ferry at Marina.

3 more weeks to the actual day.

&amp;lt;a href="http://www.mapmyrun.com/run/singapore/singapore/764411949"&amp;gt;first 20km&amp;lt;/a&amp;gt;&amp;lt;br/&amp;gt;&amp;lt;a href="http://www.mapmyrun.com/find-run/singapore/singapore"&amp;gt;Find more Runs in Singapore, Singapore&amp;lt;/a&amp;gt;

A good husband

2007-11-04T16:16:00.000+08:00

Ethan: Hey Sa, I admire you for deciding to do this for Di.
Sa: ?? What hv I done?
Ethan: For deciding to be a family of 2.
Sa: Aiyah, I though it's something else serious. :P Yr parents will luv u, yr kids will lv u when they grow up, only yr spouse will stay w u till end. We lv God to decides what is gd for us, next sunday is our 6th anniversary Isn't it more worthily to cherish than not having a kid? God has his plan, u never know..

Amen! And very inspirational for mi on how to be a good husband.

Holland V Route

2007-11-04T16:02:00.000+08:00

Run this last Thurs, took a wrong turn and reached Holland V. The run is tough and it is only approx 14km. It is about 1 month away from the 21 km. Got to increase my running schedule

Surprising that Dempensy Road is so close to my home that I can reach it by running. And there are so many beautiful secluded houses inside Tanglin Road that it does not feel like I am in Singapore, but inside an English country side.

Holland V Route
Find more Runs in Singapore, Singapore

Honda Civic Type-R

2007-10-30T22:44:00.000+08:00

My dream and maybe ..... I like the UK version, it is cute and smart!

For the Japan import

http://www.honda.co.jp/CIVICTYPE-R/

For the official UK spec one
http://www.honda.co.uk/car/

Club Med Bali (19 Oct to 21 Oct)

2007-10-22T22:50:00.000+08:00

I wanted to fly away on airplane and on the day when I am one year older, wake up on a different land. And I got my wish, beautiful great white sand and crystal clear blue water welcomed me when I opened my eyes on my birthday. And sweet chirping songs of birds are always are in the background of the fresh clean morning air during my stay there.

And so amazing is the sight of many stars, so many of them and so beautiful against the dark blue night sky. I wished I had my camera there.

On my departure day, I wished I could stay longer and the feeling was reinforced hard when I started work next day.

I glad did this, the time away and far from all that is familiar allows me to feel peace and to relax.
And the trip helped me to found one clue to my recent depression is the familiar surrounding that I called home for too long of my life.

I need a change. I need a change in either my status or my environment. I glad I found the reason. I need to work at it now.

Happy Birthday

2007-10-19T01:00:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday, Beautiful Invisibles.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

2007-10-18T23:23:00.000+08:00

Walking into Changi Airport Terminal 2 bring back memories, seeing the high floor ceiling, the neat row of metal chairs near the entrance, the cool minty conditioned air, the low background noise of people rushing to counters. It was here exactly one year ago where the roller coaster ride of my life started. Then, I was a 5 year senior in a company and loved my girl.

Now, stepping into the terminal, is a < 1 month old junior and single male.

Would I feel better if I stayed in Singapore during my natal day? No, I would not. I have a deep desire to fly away in a jet plane and wake up in a different land.

MOF @ My Izukaya

2007-10-13T13:14:00.001+08:00

Last Thur, at MOF (@ Marina Square), E told me I should correct one of my older post that I was referring to my ex and not her when we met up for dinner.

Over nice Japan theme decor and jap rock-pop music, we had soba and tried that the unique white clear Japanese jelly desert that claims to be healthy and good for slimming. The food was too salty for her but was ok for me. It was obvious that she was very angry and annoyed over a lazy work colleague as she shared stories of his bad work behavior and poor quality word.

Beside this, we talked about about apologizing. Her view is it better to hear words of apology then to seeking repent (i.e. desire not to do it again) because repent requires time to verify that it would not happen again.

I agreed with her and I would still require the person to sincerely regret her action and demonstrate repentance when time cames. Because, I believe if one really loves someone, one would not intentionally hurt the person again and word plus action is so much a stronger prove of a person sincerity. And I fill the time till then with conversation where the answer hints on how well the person learn not to do it again.

Must remember this

2007-10-13T11:56:00.000+08:00

"I will make my bf speak to me even if he is angry and staying quiet." - Li

With these words , its all came together for me, words from separate people at different time in my life,

"I have a long day today, I cant talk to you now, it will not be fair to you and your company." - S
"I will talk to H later, when both of us cool down and had have calm down." - J
" ...I am tired, i dun want to lose my cool when we talk." - M
Reflections

These words came together in a flash of realization and understanding that the best course of action, during moment of conflict,
is take time out so to cool down,
to think objectivity,
to not let feeling rule the head,
to not speak sharp hurting lies,

And finally able to do mature conflict solving.

Li words make realized not all people will understand this approach and it may be tough going for me if my future partner is like Li. Even if she not like Li, the restarted conversation may take tons of patience and control to learn and find the root of the conflict, the source of the differences.

Fergie - Big girls dun cry

Complex emotions

2007-10-07T18:48:00.000+08:00

To feel love, hurt, anger and hope at the same time is simply amazing and confusing. It could be any mix of emotions and to feel a multiple of feelings competing for attention at the same time is simply overwhelming, which make it more difficult to identify and label these emotion.

For else if I don't label them, is how would I know which one is ruling me, and then to objectivity decides the dominating feeling is accurate and valid and whatever it should be a factor in the decision making.

Objectivety (Part 2)

2007-10-07T18:23:00.000+08:00

Rereading Objectivety make me realize there is a ambiguity's in what I wrote. To be precise, the ambiguity arose because the question is answering one of two 2 scenario possible. Was the question about;

1) Get into the relationship knowing what I know now as in the relationship never started.
2) Get into the relationship knowing what I know now as begin a 2nd time.

In "Objectively", the answer is more about Scenario 1 than 2. If Scenario 2 ever happens, there is a huge chasm about trust that have to be crossed, even before friendship and mutual respect cames into play.

Reflections

2007-10-06T14:28:00.000+08:00

Maybe it is the book that I am reading now, maybe it is the book message that a person repeating behavior serves as a reliable pattern and indicator to his personality and character. And the more I think and reflects on what I could pick up and learn from the last relationship, the more I agreed that E description of it as dodgy to be very accurate.

Also, the book opened my eyes that it is foolish to view angry words as they are spoken calmly and after much deep thought. They are incorrect unless they are consistent with pattern of similar statements. I wonder why I did not realize it earlier that hurt and pain can twist angry words into facts and truths in the mind. I should discount and ignore them when they are spoken in moments of emotions.

It is more accurate to discover a person repeating behavior and manner and then reference it against what is occurring to get a better understanding of the situation is the cause of the deviant behavior or spoken words. Most likely, the common and regular behavior (speech, mannerism) that repeating is the better reference point to understand a person.

End of 1st week

2007-10-02T23:38:00.000+08:00

Walking a few meters from my desk, I can sometimes see tiny bum boats traveling away from Esplanade to Clifford Pier from the 25th floor of Millenia tower. Esplanade looks beautiful in the afternoon sun, its static shiny silver triangle dragon scales contrast against the rolling green-blue sea.

The quietness of my surrounding does not help in absorbing the very dry writing of the technical documents for the project I am assigned to. The reading got easier after I figured the map of the document and begins to understand why he structured the document so. Beside reading, this week had been spent coming to term with the banking industry jargon and the company lingo.

The last two days been spent in Suntec conference room (with tea breaks and lunch provided!), listening to the roadmap for the systems to be delivered over the next few years. The planning are explained in terms of countries roll-out and is very international focus. The systems are built by the company development units (DU).

What gives a warmth fuzziness feelings in my body was hearing the boss of these DU explaining that my department must be involved in reviewing and solutioning for large scale or strategy projects. I hope its mean software architectures and planning plays a important role in the success of the company.

Is it reasonable to say that the industry recognition of software architects are due to the hard to enhance systems due to poor architecture and multiple of software systems that together subtract value away from the company?

I starting to have a nice feeling here. Hope the feelings continues as the weeks go by.